"Nothing is more appealing to a buyer than getting a great deal. And, the mental image the buyer has of a seller scavenging through their bathroom cabinets in search of razor blades is a bonus. It's a disruptive, innovative, marketing idea." Lorrie gleefully stated.
Although Sellers-slashing-their-wrists.com is only a six month old start up, the site has already recruited over 2000 masochistic sellers, and a very sadistic, but loyal, buyer base.
It is currently ranked as the 29,547 most visited site, an increase of over 20,000 spots in the last month. "We realize that many of their sellers are Ebay sellers also, because of the shared masochistic personality traits. So there will be a small percentage of duplication of listings. Those sellers will have to adjust their inventory. It's just another reason for them to go off the deep end." Lorrie chuckled.
Let me burn my initials in your shoulder!
Ex-CEO Bernard Schick of Sellers slashing, stated that only seven sellers have slit their wrists since their site has been up, with only one fatality. "Most sellers are ignorant. They're supposed to slash length wise, not across the wrists. We're trying to get that information out." Bernard stated.
Seller Hubert Lehrer, a Slash seller since inception, thinks Ebay's purchase is great for Slasher sellers. " Our life expectancy just increased by at least three months. I've been selling my wares at 20% below my wholesale price, something had to give." Hubert said.
"Plus, I was getting really tired of buyer feedback asking me when I was going to kill myself." Hubert added.
Lorrie stated that Ebay was glad to help. "We want kamikaze sellers that are willing to go the distance for Ebay. The sellers we have are namby pamby weak kneed Willies. This new breed of Slasher sellers on site will stiffen Ebay sellers upper lips, and have them sell at a loss if they have to. It is for the good of the community." Lorrie said.
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